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SOME bad behaviour, a very pretty slug and some actual rain.
The ten things we learnt this week are:
1. We’re coming for you, France
If only we had 100 million more of these, France would be finished
Climate-change: Bad for water supplies, bad for the lawn, bad for crops, bad for dairy farming and bad for wasp-free picnics. But good for grapes, apparently. La Mare Wine Estate is expecting its best ever vintage this year. If only France hadn’t got that market sown up, we’d be on to a winner.
2. The man who went to Battle (with a restaurant’s awning)
He went from the UK to this place and back to the UK. But at least he got to see the Battle of Flowers (34033438)
A 28-year-old man who came to the Island to work in the Battle of Flowers has been ordered to leave Jersey and not return for three years, after he admitting causing malicious damage to a restaurant. And the Island was left asking one question: He came here to work for the Battle? Why?
3. Isn’t she just the prettiest slug in the whole wide world
Berghia coerulescens, doing its bit to bring glamour to the slug world Picture: NICK JOUAULT (34033712)
If sea slugs have beauty pageants – and perhaps they do – then this pretty little thing would surely take the crown. And she has decided to set up home here. The Berghia coerulescens was recently spotted showing off her orange and blue highlights at the Ecréhous, in what is the first recorded sighting of the species in British waters.
4. The war on Omicron has begun
A doctor preparing to administer a Spikevax jab (34033459)
The good news: Jersey is to get a new vaccine which targets both ‘classic Covid’ and one of the new Omicron strains (BA.1). The bad news: Covid has reinvented itself more times than Prince and by the autumn, Omicron may be sooooo last year. And its name – Spikevax – will send a shiver down the spine of anyone scared of needles.
5. When the wrong side is the right side
A young actor demonstrating two cars driving towards each other (34033494)
Have you ever driven down a country lane in France and been suddenly confronted with a car coming straight towards you on the wrong side of the road? And then you see the driver is rather angry about something. And then you remember you are no longer in Jersey and it’s you who’s on the wrong side (and then you convince your passengers that you had merely switched lanes to avoid a pothole)? No? Really? Well a 26-year-old Polish woman was fined £2,000 and banned from driving for three months after tootling down the wrong side of St Saviour’s Road following a ‘momentary lapse in concentration’ after recently returning from her homeland.
6. A no-fly-zone is in place over St Peter
‘So I’ve had this persistent cough for a while and I’ve completely lost my sense of taste and smell’ (34033571)
A 3km protection zone has been put in place around a farm in St Peter, following an outbreak of bird flu. It was the only option, as it is completely impossible to get a chicken to socially distance.
7. There’s money in coffee
An Islander’s average coffee consumption, apparently (34033600)
A barista pilfered cash out of the tils at a town coffee shop and no-one realised for three months, by which time she had pocketed £4,000. You know the Island drinks a lot of coffee when your staff make off with a few thousand quid and it goes unnoticed.
8. Some men in suits got together to look at some tarmac
An action shot from the recent Visite Royale
The Bailiff, the Jurats, some lawyers and some politicians all got together this week to have a good old look at a bit of road. It was actually a Visite Royale, and they were inspecting a new boundary plaque on the border between St Clement and Grouville. After confirming that all was in order, the delegation moved on to other important matters.
9. Don’t forget – Pride of Jersey voting is under way
Jersey Mencap winning an award last year. Go on, get voting…
If you haven’t voted – don’t delay, there’s just a few days left until the polls close. It’s a whole lot more fun than voting in the election – and you might even know who some of the candidates are. Here you go, just click here prideofjersey.com
10. It rained! It actually rained!
The Island filled with that lovely smell you get when it hasn’t rained for a while (34033644)
It was all too brief, but wasn’t that little downpour on Wednesday afternoon fun. At least it reminded us what actual rain is like. And didn’t it make you want to run outside, umbrella in hand…
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